The internets have in up in a furore ever since Samidoh and Karen Nyamu’s relationship was revealed. The interesting thing about this is the fact that he has been married top his high school sweetheart for years.
Further intrigue was injected into their affair when Karen Nyamu decided to have a go at Edday Nderitu, the woman who could have potentially been her co-wife. And all Samidoh would do is sit on the sidelines and watch the madness devolve even further with the rest of us.
Then there was Dj Mo who also had a monumental debacle of an affair. He was stupid enough to go for a lady who was less attractive than his wife and he completely made a fool of himself simping for this clande who eventually outed him and humiliated his wife.
What these two men did got me and my friends talking over the weekend and we realized that they clearly have not had a gander at the Cheaters Bible. And they haven’t been trained in the art of espionage that is infidelity.
And so I want to delve into the subtle art of cheating on your wife or girlfriend that you really need to understand if you have decided to be a complete scumbag And I need all of Samidoh and DJ Mo’s friends to pull them here to read how they can improve on the rubbish they did.
#1. Samidoh and DJ Mo shouldn’t ever publicly humiliate their wives
Women need their honour preserved. you do not do your dirt publicly. Keep it all private. That means that for you to be able to cheat on your partner and get away with it, you have to do everything possible to keep the affair clandestine. The name itself gives you all the rules of the game. It is called a clandestine affair, not the makachieth circus we have been treated to.
You keeping things private allows your partner to save face but also, plays on the rule (unofficial and unwritten) that women would rather share a dominant man than keep a faithful spineless one.
#2. Don’t jeopardise your resources
Samidoh and DJ Mo have both broken this cardinal rule. you see, if their paramours were their second wives, then spending money on them would have been forgivable. Instead, they would have been celebrated for being responsible men. But if you’re with a chipo you absolutely do not spend money on them. Bare minimum all you are allowed to spend is the money for fuel for your car, money for a condom and a few drinks. And even that is arguable.
When you end up sending significant amounts via Mpesa as Dj mo did or you decide to impregnate your affair partner, not even your ancestors will forgive you. You have jeopardised your children’s inheritance and that is something even your mother will be livid at you for doing.
#3. Put an effort into keeping things discrete
DJ Mo and Samidoh broke this rule but that only means we must learn from their mistakes. Never ever allow an affair to go public. What you do is something informed by a famous wives tale; the more effort you put into hiding your affair, the more you love and care for your wife. The logic is pretty simple and straight forward. Sexual energy is a fact of life and testosterone is scientifically shown to make men’s sex drive overwhelmingly more than that of women. Men are naturally inclined to cheat but civilisation has tried to tame that.
But if Samidoh and his brother DJ Mo were smart, they would have done anything and everything to hide their clandestine moves. That might even mean getting a kabambe and not sending nudes.
#4. Protect your partner
This was the biggest failing of both Samidoh and DJ Mo. They failed to stand up for their partners when it counted. When Karen Nyamu began attacking Edday, Samidoh maintained sharap. When DJ Mo was outed by his paramour, he did not move swiftly to shut down the bullshit and stand by his wife. How is your partner supposed to defend you when her sisters and mother decide to disrespect you after your affair is outed?
April 22, 2021