GHAFLA EXPLORES: These Are The Five Best Places In Nairobi To Take A Girl On A First Date…..(Number 5 Will Make Her Wet)
Over the weekend, a reader asked me a rather important question. He said “Niaje Etemesi, which are the best places to take a chick on a date in Nairobi?”I told him to check Ghafla today. And I know he’ll click on this article expecting to see things like Java and Arboretum. No way.
Most guys struggle when it comes to figuring out places to take women that they are meeting for the first time. However, selecting the appropriate venue is actually easy if you don’t think too much about it. If a girl agrees to a date, that means she already likes you and you just have to eke out a respectable performance to get some action later on. If you are in Nairobi, here are the best places to take a chick on your first date
1. Your Keja (But of course)
If you want to avoid wasting time and spending too much money, then there’s no better place to go. I can’t believe that in 2016, there are still guys who take chicks on expensive dinner dates. Please fellas. Dinner Is what your girlfriend or your mama cooks you. Leave dinner dates to sponsors. If you are stuffing food in your mouth, you are not charming a chick or giving her a C.J. Simply, take her to your place, give her juice, watch a movie with her for 5 minutes then bang her. You should only cook for her after the first round of sex, to make sure she is worth it. Some girls only go on dates to eat the food that men provide.
Understand that chicks are less attracted to dudes that are willing to abide women’s stated preference for delayed sexual gratification. In other words, if you sincerely agree, tacitly or openly, with a woman to her arbitrary timetable for sex — “Sure, we can wait, I respect you” — you will have decreased the chance she will ever have drop them panties for you. In the primeval mind of a woman, the man who is willing to patiently endure her chasteness, without complaint, is a man who doesn’t have too many other options in women, and thus signals his low mate value. And the longer he is willing to suffer her clamped legs, the less attraction she will feel for him. If you want to know what you should do when a chick comes to your place then refuses to have sex, read THIS
2. Swimming pool
Physical escalation is important when you are trying to bang a chick and there’s no better place to get your hands all over her titties, buttocks and thighs than in a swimming pool. She is almost naked and you are too, hence there’s a sense of sexual immediacy. There are plenty of cheap or free swimming pools in Nairobi so finding one shouldn’t be a problem. While at the pool, tickle her and play with her. She will get horny and then you can touch her wherever you want without her resisting. After that, you are guaranteed some hot shagging
The great advantage to *not* waiting for lungula on a woman’s prerogative is that you are in the driver’s seat; you can choose to pump and dump or to pursue a relationship after you have sated yourself. You are in no position to think clearly as long as your balls remain filled with brain-blocking sperm. At least if you have bonked a chick on the first date, you know for certain she’s into you, and nothing bonds a woman to a man better than sex.
3. A strip club
For men, the whole point of dates is getting the pussy. Love comes later on. For women, though, love comes first and if you run things by their book, it’ll take you weeks before you hit that ‘P’. In order for you to make a great first date impression, take a chick to a strip club. Don’t tell her about it in advance, just surprise her. Say “Beb I wanna take you somewhere special.” Then you hold her hand and walk her into a club she has never heard about before. As soon as you enter,…..Walaaaa… there’s titties everywhere. This will confuse her but it will also get her sexually excited. Note: Only do this if she seems like the kind of chick that loves adventure
4. A church
This is a classic way to make a woman think you a responsible and spiritually focused guy. But in your heart, you know you are just a hyena covered in sheep’s wool. After church, invite her to your place for lunch then start quoting bible verses that make reference to sex and temptation. Say, “You remember when King David saw Bethsheba naked? I wonder what causes such temptations. Because I keep dreaming about you naked and I don’t know what to do about it.” She will be shocked and amused at the same time. After that, go ham with sexual innuendos and you might just find yourself feasting her. Remember to repent afterwards though
5. A CORD demonstration
A CORD demonstration gives you the chance to be a real-life Iron Man or Batman. Let me explain. There have been lots of CORD demonstrations of late and there will definitely be more as the election season gets into full gear. This means that if you know that a demo is going to happen on Monday, set up a date on that day. If you get caught up in the demo before you get to your date destination, you won’t have to spend. Plus you can play the superhero by showing her where to hide and wiping the tears from her eyes…..ladies can I get an ‘awwww’? Trust me, there will be plenty of tears in her eyes as a result of the teargas. DIDN’T I TELL YOU NUMBER 5 WILL MAKE HER WET? I just forgot to mention that it was her face i was talking about, not those other regions. On second thought, cancel this point….unless your name is Manono
Have a blessed week peeps.
