3 lessons we learn from Ben Pol and Anerlisa Muigai’s divorce

Image: Ex husband cum lover Ben Pol

Ben Pol has finally begun opening up about what exactly transpired between him and Anerlisa Muigai and boy is it vastly interesting to finally get his side of events. You see, when news broke that they were divorcing, it was she who ran around telling her story and her version of accounts. Wouldn’t you know, she refused to own any responsibility over the fact that the relationship was coming to an end.

“You cannot breakup today and move on tomorrow” Benpol implies ex wife, Anerlisa Muigai was cheating

As far as we, the observing public were concerned, he remained stoic. He was silent even as he was insulted and had his name dragged through the mud. We all wondered why he preferred to stay mum while all the flaws and faults of the relationship were dumped at his doorstep, right on his feet.

Ben Pol files for divorce from Anerlisa Muigai

But that is why we are having this conversation today because he has a lot to teach us and we really need to sit down and take the time to learn some lessons from Ben Pol and the manner in which he conducted himself throughout his marriage and the subsequent divorce.

Anerlisa Muigai still hasn’t learnt from Ben Pol divorcing her

#1. Do not trip on your tongue

Ben Pol could have fought his wife on social media. Instead, he chose to focus all that energy inwards and improve who he is as a man. While his wife was busy slandering him and complaining about why it was her marriage had failed, we saw Ben Pol go in search of God and he ultimately converted to Islam. Then after that, we saw him focus on his businesses and craft and he put out some really dope music.

Trust me when I say he would never have managed to mature from all this was he busy tripping on his tongue, trying to defend himself against all the allegations and insinuations his ex-wife was dropping.

Anerlisa and Ben Pol’s young marriage allegedly going South

#2. Women never take accountability

Anerlisa Muigai has refused to own up to why her marriage ended and her role in all that. She has since hinted at her exes all being the problem. Mara one wanted to use her as an ATM, mara another wanted her to invest in his business, mara huyo mwingine kafanya upuzi ile and nowhere does she pose and think, maybe when I reacted like this to that or when I said this, I wasn’t speaking nor living my truth, I was just adding crazy fuel to a stupid fire.

And that is why I am predicting that even if her current relationship blossoms into a marriage, she will be twice-divorced -she hasn’t done the work to better herself since Ben Pol and hasn’t matured from who she was as a wife.

Why Anerlisa Muigai and Ben Pol’s intrigues captivate us

#3. She’s not yours, its just your turn

Ben Pol recently gave an interview in which he posed a rather interesting question about just how quickly his ex-wife managed to move on that is actually a very prudent observation:

After whatever happened in my personal life, in my opinion I felt that if someone was really in a relationship, that space and was really invested, you can’t end things yesterday and tomorrow you move on with life like nothing happened.

Ben Pol

And that is something that would require a response but most aren’t mature enough for that conversation. But if we are being realistic, when a man dates and even marries a woman, he needs to understand that she is not his, it’s just his turn. And this truth is amplified more by the fact that she had a lot of past lovers meaning each man had left their mark and scar on her. And the more previous lovers she had, the less likely she is to truly pair bond. Anerlisa Muigai will never belong to anyone. Her ego, her romantic history and her refusal to get therapy get in the way of any happily ever after.

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My name is Ozymandias, King of Kings; Look on my Works, ye Mighty, and despair! Nothing beside remains. Round the decay