If Jalang’o could work with Jeff Koinange, he can work anywhere with anyone

The biggest news of the week is probably that Kenyans already know that Jalang’o is waiting to be announced as the guy who has replaced Andrew Kibe on the Kiss100 breakfast show with Kamene Goro called What the fact or is it Wake the fact up?

Jalang’o unearths never before seen photos of his first car

All this was following the revelation Andy Kibe was no longer going to be on the show following the Radio Africa Limited owned radio stations decision not to continue working with him and the fact that Jalang’o claimed he had met the company’s CEO Patrick Quarcoo.

jalang'o

Kenyans who are usually quick to look for easy explanations and shortcuts assumed that Jalang’o had a hand to play in Kiss100’s decision to let Andrew Kibe go as if they were not willing to acknowledge the hard work Jalang’o has put into his brand and building a following.

Kibe’s exit from Kiss FM opens the door for Jalang’o to join

And now the latest narrative online is that Jalang’o will not be able to work with Kamene Goro because they speak to different audiences. It is almost as if Kenyans either think of Jalang’o as a dumb guy or they do not have the intelligence to retain the memory of the fact that Jalas worked with Jeff Koinange. And not only did they work together, Jalang’o made it work. As a result, that team succeeded.

jalang'o

And this one fact is such an interesting fact because we have to remember that for Jalang’o, working with a guy who is the scion of Kenya’s upper echelon, a guy who at one point worked with CNN, one of the biggest news agencies in the world, a guy whose reality is so far removed from most Kenyans, a guy whose sense of humour is from a generation three times older than Heavy J’s and you realize Jalang’o can probably work with anyone.

jeff koinange who worked with jalang'o

Look at the cast of people Heavy J has worked with during his tenure on radio. From Caroline Mutoko to Alex Mwakideu and Jeff Koinange and you cannot honestly claim you cannot see Jalang’o making it work with Kamene Goro, a woman who is closer to his age and days.

Ted Josiah’s revelation on marriage reveals his hypocrisy in attacking Jalang’o

Actually, I would argue that the only better match would be for Jalang’o to work with either one of the Radio Jambo morning presenters Gidi or Ghost or for him to work with Andrew Kibe.

 

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Kibe’s exit from Kiss FM opens the door for Jalang’o to join

Jalang’o aka Jalas, aka Heavy J is an example of why people should invest heavily on building their brands -especially those in media. You see, he was fired from Mediamax owned Milele FM for refusing to accept a fifty per cent pay cut just a few short days ago.

Jalang’o and Betty Kyallo: new partnership loading

And already, it would seem like luck is on his side because following a reported meeting with the Radio Africa Limited CEO, Patrick Quarcoo, news just reaching us this morning intimates that the company which owns Kiss 100 has decided to part ways with Andrew Kibe.

jalang'o

The details for this decision is still not clear but what is clear is that if you’re a lazy bum, you think this is proof that Jalang’o has a guardian angel or luck on his side.

Jalang’o should now chase independent media pursuits

The truth of the matter, however, is less grandiose or based on destiny than you would like to think: he -Felix Odiwuor is simply reaping the rewards of all the hard work he put into his brand as Jalang’o which has amassed for him a following and that is why Radio Africa Limited has been flirting with the idea of bringing him on board.

jalang'o

Add to this the fact that he has also been building his digital presence with a YouTube account that has grown as if he had fed it steroids and you see why other media houses would want to get him. Most traditional media companies have a protected position due to the heavy capital investment required and the political connections one must have to start radio stations. As a result of the internet, however, the barriers to entry into the media and content creation field no longer exist and as a result, traditional media is struggling to get a foothold in the digital space outside of reporting news.

Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

And Jalang’o had the sense to sit in that desired space -an organically grown and maintained content generation field with a massive following.

andrew kibe and kamene goro

So as we wait to see what unfolds, I would wager that Kiss 100 is waiting on the wings for an opportune time or perhaps they will create that time themselves and they will announce that Jalang’o has joined their staff and he will very likely be paired with Kamene Goro.

Ted Josiah and the dishonesty of men blaming Jalang’o

Still, that morning show has lacked stability since Caroline Mutoko left the scene and while Adelle and Shaffie brought some semblance of stability, it was short-lived. It will be interesting to see what unfolds from here on out.

jalang'o

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Ted Josiah’s revelation on marriage reveals his hypocrisy in attacking Jalang’o

Ted Josiah was one of the more vocal men when it came attacking Jalang’o after he was outed by popular micro-blogger Edgar Obare with him going as far as to say that Jalang’o was a predator who was using his money and fame to lure “innocent pure, angels” into dark, sexual deviance.

Ted Josiah and the dishonesty of men blaming Jalang’o

I kid you not, Ted Josiah who has a storied love life was the guy who felt he could get on his high horse and attack another man for not being as virtuous as he was and the media ate up his bullshit because it served their narrative.

ted josiah

However, having forgotten about Jalang’o for a minute, Ted Josiah has decided to continue along the same vein of revealing a lot of information about himself and this time he has decided to come clean with his rendition of how he abandoned his former wife and two children.

My first wife left me because I was a really bad boy and immature – Ted Josiah

According to Ted Josiah, who was speaking on the NTV show Unscripted,

ted josiah

I was in a space where I wasn’t ready to be a family man. I was breaking people more than I was building them and everything that I had built was false. You know how you grow up and you are told you are supposed to get married and live in a certain way. I was just ticking boxes and then I realized I don’t even love this person.

ted josiah

And this was his explanation of why he fled to the United Kingdom at the height of Kenya’s 2007/2008 post-election violence and left his former wife and their two children. Aye, let that sink in.

Ted Josiah lost his job just months after getting a kid and losing his wife 

The same guy who was shaming Jalang’o for using his celebrity and money to sleep with consenting adults left his wife and two children behind when he fled because he feared for his life…

Ted Josiah on Jalang'o

And that is the guy who is also very public about sharing with us his trials and tribulations as a single father. That is Ted Josiah who is busy showing us his youngest child by his deceased wife and then he argues that he doesn’t share images or videos of himself hanging out and bonding with his older children because he wants to preserve their right to privacy…

“Is your greed for ratings that bad?” a disgusted Tedd Josiah scolds Ethic’s new release ‘soko’

Honestly, sometimes when you see information like this you cannot help but wonder whether the story and narrative have been made up by a bad Indian soap opera for the main antagonist. And then it strikes you that this is Ted Josiah.

The one and same guy who was recently virtue signalling and trying to whitewash the involvement of consenting adults in their nonsense drama with Jalang’o all to show that he is a better man. If that hypocrisy doesn’t smack you across the face, I don’t know what will.

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Jalang’o and Betty Kyallo: new partnership loading

Jalang’o and Betty Kyallo were both victims of the recent axe that fell at Mediamax owned stations, Milele Fm and K24 respectively. And interestingly, they both took the same approach to the news, “You can’t fire me because I quit”.

Betty Kyallo repairing relationship with Denis Okari and we love it

Jalang’o has been working on his own brand and platform through his YouTube videos and Betty Kyallo announced that she would be focusing more on her business, Flair by Betty.

betty kyallo

However, what is interesting is the fact that when Jalang’o hosted her on his YouTube segment, they lit up the interview with their chemistry.

Betty Kyallo´s hot replacement at K24 now turning heads (Photos)

And then, with Betty Kyallo relaunching her business, she has tapped into Jalang’o to host the entire event. And perhaps, this is a spark that perhaps they can work on building and form the next powerful media partnership.

betty kyallo

You see, a situation could emerge where after Corona, the media begins to re-adjust in the next few months and business begins to return, they will search for new brands and Jalang’o and Betty Kyallo can be just that.

Lessons we hope Denis Okari will teach Betty Kyallo about marriage

It would understandably be a difficult task at the offset. You see, Betty Kyallo and Jalang’o speak to two different and very diverse audiences. But it is their shared sense of humour that can bring the two worlds together. It wouldn’t be so far removed in concept from the days when Jalang’o was the sidekick on Kiss FM’s breakfast show with Caroline Mutoko.

And it would be quite the pairing. With Jalang’o providing the homely, down to earth humour and Betty Kyallo regaling the world with her ditzy, worldly experiences and knowledge.

betty kyallo

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Alex Mwakideu doesn’t owe an explanation about his decision to stay at Milele FM

Alex Mwakideu it would seem, agreed to a 50 per cent pay cut in order for him to safeguard his job at Milele FM. That is the reason why both he and Jalang’o, his former morning show partner are no longer working together for Milele FM.

Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

You see, Jalang’o opted not to accept the paycut. Alex Mwakideu, however, familiar with the pressures he faces and the unique situations they occasion, has decided that he would swallow humble pie and stay on.

alex mwakideu and jalang'o
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

Ofcourse, this isn’t a popular decision with a lot of the fans and followers on his former partner in crime, Jalang’o’s social media accounts demanding an explanation of why he took the option he did. As a result, Jalas took his right of reply and commented on the matter.

Alex Mwakideu’s reaction after learning about Jalango’s exit from Milele FM

According to what happened with regards to Alex Mwakideu, Heavy J explained that his reaction was as follows:

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu's infidelity scandal

Alex Mwakideu, my friend and my brother did not know that I was not going to come to work. When we did not agree on a lot of things and my HR told me we seem to have hit a rock, you will not come to work tomorrow. I tried calling Mwakideu he had already slept. He wakes up in the morning thinking that I will be going to work, at six he calls and says bro you’re late where are you? I told him I’m not coming, I’ve been fired.

Mwakideu sank low and told me bro you are lying and told him it’s the truth, the redundancy affected me and I will not be coming to work. Mwakideu told me that it was the longest 4 hours of his life because he had to do the show alone.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

But the truth of the matter as stated earlier is that Alex Mwakideu owes no one an explanation. We all came into this world alone. When our time arrives, we shall exit alone.

alex mwakideu

Alex Mwakideu at the end of the day, as the head of his household, is aware that the buck stops with him when it comes to his family. When rent is due, or school fees and his children look to him, he cannot feed them excuses. So he took the only decision that seemed to make sense to him.

Alex Mwakideu’s wife celebrates her husband with emotional message as he turns 40 years!

This ofcourse is thinking in line with the information we have that Mediamax, the parent company of Milele FM and K24 had demanded all its employees take a hefty pay cut.

alex mwakideu and jalas in studio
Milele FM presenters, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

At the end of the day, the day ends and Alex Mwakideu is well aware that his battles are his own to bear. While he did not foresee the firing of his crony, he wasn’t in a position to do anything about it and he will simply have to keep trudging on with this thing called life. And ultimately, he is in charge of deciding the outcome of his life and he owes it to himself to put in every effort to make his life great.

 

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Jalang’o should now chase independent media pursuits

Jalang’o has a brand that is one of the biggest within Kenya’s entertainment and media landscapes. He is a comedian, events MC, radio personality and these different hats he wears are a great indicator of the number of jobs Jalang’o could potentially work.

Jalang’o quits Milele FM

He was recently laid off by Mediamax who let go of all their members of staff working in their K24 newsroom and a large number of people working in their other media companies such as Milele FM.

jalang'o

It was reported that the staff who were affected by the termination of their employment were informed via SMS and they were asked to go meet up with the Mediamax HR. Jalang’o was one of those affected and he revealed that he and the company did not reach a compromise so he opted to walk away.

“Kitambi ni kazi ya Mungu!” Jalang’o takes a swipe at Kenyan men spending money in the gym

But you shouldn’t shed a tear for Jalang’o is you are a fan of his nor should you rejoice at his downfall if you are a hater of his. Why? For starters, it has already been revealed that he received 6 job offers already.

jalang'o

Add to that the fact that Jalang’o just needs to pursue his vision for now and build for himself a huge digital print. You see, Jalang’o has already put down the foundation stones for exactly that.

Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

He has a YouTube account that is growing at a phenomenal rate. If he can build that even further when he is ready to get back on the radio or even on TV, he can use that to negotiate for himself an obese deal. Or maybe he could just remain independent and become something like DJ Akademiks abroad.

jalang'o

Whatever the case may be, one thing is certain, Jalang’o will be fine regardless of what he decides to do.

 

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Why Kenyans defended Alex Mwakideu but persecuted Jalang’o

Alex Mwakideu and Jalang’o were both exposed by their new archnemesis, Edgar Obare and it was rather interesting to see how Kenyans reacted to their two situations very differently. The dichotomy between the two reactions was almost night and day. With Jalang’o, Kenyans were livid at the radio personality, to the point of using his indiscretions as proof that men from his ethnic community are no good lotharios.
When it was Alex Mwakideu up on the chopping block, Kenyans reacted with revulsion towards Edgar Obare to the point of calling for his man card to be revoked.

“We will not defend ourselves” Jalang’o confirms viral screenshot chats from ‘The boys club’ are true

Mwakideu’s visitation was a literal mirror of Jalas’own situation but the reactions were on two opposite ends of the spectrum. Both have a WhatsApp group that they use to boast about their conquests. Boys Club vs Porini. And because it is such an interesting case study, I want us to look at why Kenyans reacted to these two men and their situations so divergently.

Edgar Obare and Jalang'o

For starters, Kenyans are tribalists. That is why people immediately went into that mode of thinking where they felt Jalang’o was merely living up to his tribe’s stereotype of being a ladies man. The Nairobian even ran a piece that was so bullshit, it literally reads “Why women are running away from Luo men after Jalang’o’s drama”. The details about what Jalas and Alex do are nearly identical down to their WhatsApp group yet here Kenyans want to treat them differently. Why? Because one is a Luo and the other isn’t.

Crucial lessons Kenyans can learn from Alex Mwakideu’s cheating scandal

The second reason for the different reactions was the fact that fundamentally, these two men represent different values. Well, that should have an asterisk to it. Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu are the same animals but different beasts. They stand on the same value sets. But Mwakideu outwardly espouses a different set of values. He is “the family man”. As a result, Kenyans rallied to his defence arguing that Edgar Obare was ruining families. He was callously exposing a philanderer and causing his wife to leave.

Jalas and Mwakideu
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

The third reason for this nonsense is that Jalang’o who is flashy, courts envy more than Alex Mwakideu. Jalang’o is flashy. He is everywhere. Get online and chances are, you will come across his brand. On TV, you will interact with his brand. He is also a radio personality. Also, he is vocal. This has caused a lot of men who openly envy and resent Jalas to bash him. On the other hand, Mwakideu has presented himself as a laid back man so men who do not view him as a threat would rather cape for him.

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Stop blaming Edgar Obare for the fault in your stars

Edgar Obare has come under attack so much these past few days after he leaked information about two married radio personalities’ infidelity. Edgar Obare has seemed to be a man possessed when it comes to “dishing tea” about Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu.
Actually it has seemed like a concerted campaign to be honest. he seems to have a hard-on for destroying these two men.

Alex Mwakideu’s infidelity exposed as Edgar Obare introduces ‘Porini boys’!

And that is the issue many people are bringing up with regard to Edgar Obare but first, the backstory. He dropped a gem on Jalang’o, exposing the fact that he is part of a WhatsApp group that was all about smashing women and living a good life.
Alex Mwakideu was next when Edgar Obare revealed his affair with a fat female who honestly I feel wasn’t worth him risking his marriage over but you know, some men can get anyone, others take whoever takes them.

Jalang'o and Edgar Obare
Milele FM co-hosts, Jalang´o (left) and Alex Mwakideu (right)

Edgar Obare was the subject of much-heated debate after he revealed Alex Mwakideu’s affair and philandering ways as Kenyans demanded he cease exposing these men.
Suddenly, it was his fault for destroying these two friends and co-workers marriages. Suddenly, the micro blogger needed to hand in his man-card with Andrew Kibe even speaking on the matter. Twitter was set ablaze with all the know-nothing intelligentsia (who feel the sun rises from their posteriors), giving their hot take on masculinity and how Edgar Obare has betrayed men.

“Don’t blame me for your poor judgement and problems!” Edgar Obare tells Jalang’o to man up!

And now that the dust has settled, it is time for us to actually have an intelligent conversation about what’s what and hopefully cut through the bullshit. And that at the end of the day boils down to projection.
Edgar Obare did nothing wrong. He is a tabloid micro-blogger using his own IG platform for some serious content creation and he is earning money from it. He meets his financial obligations and is smart about making sure he spaces his content to keep all of Kenya hooked.

Alex Mwakideu and his wife

Jalang’o and Alex Mwakideu did nothing out of the ordinary. I have to state that fact. The two men simply attempted to actualize their sexual strategy: Sleep with as many women as possible. We aren’t here to debate the ethics and morality of the matter and I do not care what your bishop says. Go and give him your three hundred and ten shillings tithe and shut the hell up.
The only sin here worth discussing is the fact that they were sloppy enough to get caught.

¨You are not man enough!¨ Kenyans ruthlessly take on Edgar Obare following Jalango´s expose

Edgar Obare isn’t some sort of moral standard nor is he claiming to be policing Kenya’s moral fabric. He is simply a micro-blogger doing business. Take your opinions of that to the toilet. Jalang’o got caught. He will answer to his marriage. I think he is high value enough for him to survive this scandal. The same goes for Alex Mwakideu. I mean, sure, there will be hell to pay because they have made their wives shame public but beyond that, they will be alright.
But Kenyans are deep in their feelings about this. And it is because they are projecting their fear of getting caught onto Edgar. How dare he snitch? How dare he expose the fault in our stars?!

Jalas, Alex Mwakideu and Alex' alleged mistress

Nah, ask instead why your stars got caught. Why are you so scared of getting caught? Don’t be sloppy. Keep your wits about your indiscretion. Keep your house in order. No one is coming to save you. You get yourself into your mess, you get yourself out. It wasn’t Edgar Obare who put these two men’s families in jeopardy. All he did was business. And the last time I checked, Kenya is a capitalist economy. Feelings peleka kwa choo.
And sure, Edgar Obare is going after Jalas and Mwakideu like a dog with a bone but they never should have given him ammunition. And at the end of the day, if he has the evidence to back up his allegations, he has them in pocket.

Ted Josiah and the dishonesty of men blaming Jalang’o

Be upset at the two men for letting you down if indeed you looked up to them.

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Ted Josiah and the dishonesty of men blaming Jalang’o

Ted Josiah was among the many celebrities taking shots at Jalang’o for his uncovered hanky pankies that were exposed by Edgar Obare. He decided to absolve the women involved of any and all agency over their actions in effect casting them in the role of children.

Why everyone is blaming Jalang’o for societal truths

Jalang’o was cast into the role of an unwilling role model simply by the fact that he is a celebrity (he is celebrated). And after casting him in the unwanted role, he was judged to have failed. And Ted Josiah could now virtue signal himself to the world as being the quintessential good man.
Never mind that he has his own skeletons in the closet. Never mind that we all have our own issues.

Ted Josiah on Jalang'o

Anyway, to Ted Josiah and his ilk, rather than believe that all human beings are capable of getting up to all sorts of devilry, he subscribes to the school of thought that men are to blame for all the ills that have befallen the world. The type of men who are tough on men and very permissive of bad behaviour from females.

“We will not defend ourselves” Jalang’o confirms viral screenshot chats from ‘The boys club’ are true

And how can you trust such a man? A simp? A man trying to signal to m’lady that aye, all men are trash but him. He is just a bit less trashy. Men like Ted Josiah are incapable of committing to an ideology, a purpose or a goal because the minute an opportunity comes around for them to sell you out for coin or loin, they will take it.

jalang'o sitting on his car
Kenyan comedian, Jalang’o

Jalang’o by no means is blameless. He is guilty of being caught. That is all. What he did is an issue for he and his wife to deal with and by all indications, she has decided not to get at him or leave. They will deal with their situation privately.
Why then would ted Josiah have a problem? It cannot be for moral issues because he was accused by one of his exes of abandoning both her and their children together. That should put things into perspective. Ted Josiah is no saint. So why would he ignore the log in his eye and point out the speck in his brother’s?

My first wife left me because I was a really bad boy and immature – Ted Josiah

It is because he is a simp. A man willing to sacrifice all for the sake of loin. A man willing to damn another to the hell of social media derision simply so he can signal some yet unknown woman that he is different, he is better. Never mind the skeletons in his closet; never mind the abandoned children.

ted josiah
Veteran music producer, Tedd Josiah

And that is the cognitive dissonance that rules the mind of a simp. It is a crab in the bucket mentality. It is a self-righteous mentality. And if he had any sense in his coconut, he would have known to maintain sharp. Yet here we find ourselves. having to endure a deadbeat dad call out a fornicator.

¨Don´t test God!¨ A fed up Tedd Josiah issues stern warning to Jalang´o and his boys

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Why everyone is blaming Jalang’o for societal truths

In the empire of lies, truth is treason. That is what Jalang’o and his FBoys club have just realized for themselves. Jalang’o aka Jalas, aka Heavy J found himself trending after the communication in his WhatsApp group was leaked on social media. In the screenshots, it could be seen that he and his boys were gloating over the fact that they were sleeping with countless women and spending obscene money to do so and when they did manage to finally bed their quarry, she would be swiftly passed on to the next gentleman.

“We will not defend ourselves” Jalang’o confirms viral screenshot chats from ‘The boys club’ are true

This ofcourse earned the ire of male feminists, virtue signallers and feminists. People who are all too eager to don a cape and save a heaux because at the heart of the matter that is what this is about prostitution.  But why is Jalang’o being crucified for engaging in consensual coitus and later paying for the service? Well, the issue has a lot to do with the pedestalization of women.

jalang'o
Kenyan comedian, Jalang’o

You see, society has pedestalized women and put them in a position that no mere mortal should aspire to. And to protect this image of women, we demonize men as the cause of all their suffering and when women make short-sighted decisions that result in some public and heavy consequences, they move on to blame men.

“A female fan alleged she was my PA, got keys to my hotel room and hid under the bed” Jalang’o recounts

Jalang’o did nothing wrong to anyone outside of his wife. And that is working under the assumption that he did something wrong to begin with. Jalang’o didn’t force himself onto anyone. He simply extended an invitation to the women who accepted. He informed them of the terms and conditions, which were accepted.

jalang'o posing

Because we put young, beautiful women up on a pedestal, we refuse to accept that they would ever willingly involve themselves in such seedy affairs. Jalang’o and his FBoys Club become a lightning rod for our ire because he offers us the low hanging fruit that is a quick scapegoat.
And the situation has become so bad that even celebrities are weighing in on the matter and laying blame for the state of everything including the GoK’s response to Covid19 on Jalas.

Ted Josiah on Jalang'o

And it is because we have pedestalized women that when a situation like these arise, we place the blame squarely at the feet on men. And this in and of itself is what feminism was created to fight against yet it is what Feminazi’s push for. You see, if you claim that Jalang’o violated these women, you relegate their decision making and autonomy, in effect making them no more than little children.

Jalang´o finally responds to getting fired and wife fleeing from home

How do you like them cakes? by defending the pedestalized women, you have now become what feminists hate the most, part of the big bad patriarchy.

 

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Jalango’s philanthropy proves Kenyan women love money over everything

Jalas Baba, Heavy J or simply Jalang’o is a hero who should be celebrated as such. He is a man championing the economy’s recognition. You see, Jalas and his boys were callously highlighted and called out of their names by the mean spirited and tight-fisted Edgar Obare who posted information alleging that they often sleep with a bevvy of beauties.

“A female fan alleged she was my PA, got keys to my hotel room and hid under the bed” Jalang’o recounts

Continue reading “Jalango’s philanthropy proves Kenyan women love money over everything”

How to Pick a Best Friend from a Crowd of ‘Best Friends’

I recently had an epiphany, listening to radio presenter, Jalang’o, aka Jalas, on Radio Maisha. For a comedian, he sometimes seems to make lots of sense. The topic that chilly morning was his unorthodox friend-picking criteria, based not on good times, but by the hard times he has gone through. It’s simple enough – pick the friend that sticks around when life goes off the rails.

Nicholas Okumo doesn’t need a comedian to teach him the ethics of basic friendship – just pick a friend that would pick you from a crowd to accompany him – for free – on an all-paid expenses trip to watch the AFCON Finals tonight, in Egypt.

Nick’s friend, Josephat Nyakundi was a lucky winner for a fully paid trip to Egypt, courtesy of Visa, to watch the AFCON Finals in Egypt. All the winners had to do was use their Coop Visa Card to pay their usual bills – buying goods and services. To add icing to that one-in-a-lifetime cake, the winners were accompanied by one other person, their choice.

I do not know if, presently, there’s a friend that I inspire enough to be their first choice to such a fete – in a narrow world crowded with adoring other-halves, patronizing relatives and prayer partners. Not that my friends are such keen soccer enthusiasts, anyways, but am glad most of them always tag along their Coop Visa cards conveniently using them to pay for fuel and other bills.

Perhaps, one day we can get to win a trip to something like the Lamu Cultural Festival.

Josephat Nyakundi had been pleasantly surprised to learn of his win to Egypt. On the material day, he hadn’t meant to use the card to pay his weekly tab at his favorite watering hole. He had a household constitution to follow, jointly formulated with his wife, Njoki. It had been just on a dare that he had taken the card along. Now he never leaves the house without his Visa Card.

In the Nyakundi-Njoki household, the Coop Visa card was to be strictly a household talisman. Pay hospital bills. Clear the weekly shopping bills at the supermarket. Pay for fuel at petrol stations during family trips.

Certainly not picking the Vodka tab with the boys at The Local. He had broken the rules, but Njoki was happy how well things had turned out. She was excited that her hubby had won the trip, and encouraged him to pick his long time soccer buddy, Nick. They watched most derbies together. She loved travelling, but couldn’t endure a minute of soccer.

In any case, she would use the weeks he’d be away to source for more carpets in Middle East. She dealt in rags and carpets at her high end outlet. She liked the idea her husband won’t be clearing beer tabs in Egypt over the card, she’d have it with her in Middle East. It’s always safer and convenient travelling with her card.

Oh, using Coop Card Visa card doesn’t incur any extra charges. No hidden charges.

Ignore the big boys, for a minute. We have an unlikely entry into the soccer arena. Picture a young girl, in early elementary school, watching today’s final with her mother. The endless possibilities in her future – the exposure, the enlightening.

Meet Natasha Angela, the lucky Jumbo Junior category winner, accompanied to Egypt by her mother Virginia Wamaitha. If reincarnation is real, this is who I’d love to be. This is a child the world has smiled upon, and shown it’s a world with endless possibilities.

At a young age, she has flown in a plane. She has witnessed firsthand, a once-in-a-lifetime happening most people in the world do not get to have. That’s amazing, thanks to her Jumbo Junior Account. Above all, Angela gets to treat her deserving mother on the world stage.

I would do anything to treat my mother on such a scale.

 

 

Jalang’o’s bitter reply at Joe Muchuri after he told him Huduma number is a scam 

Have you registered for Huduma number?

Well, today being the second last day, Kenyans are ready to die queuing for the number. Comedian Jalang’o has been campaigning for this since day one and is happy to see Kenyans are finally turning up to register.

Why register

The registration period for Huduma Namba ends on May 18. Jalang’o was forced to call out Joe Muchiri who expressed his doubts saying the number doesn’t make sense.

This is what Muchiri said:

“The part 30 million people influenced by their parents, Jalangoo & Nonini didn’t read ???????? I CONFIRM THAT THE INFORMATION INCLUDING BIOMETRICS PROVIDED BY ME IS TRUE, CORRECT AND ACCURATE. I AM AWARE THAT MY INFORMATION INCLUDING BIOMETRICS WILL BE USED FOR GENERATION OF A HUDUMA NUMBA WHICH IS A UNIQUE PERSONAL IDENTIFIER ACROSS THE GOVERNMENT SYSTEMS. I UNDERSTAND THAT MY INFORMATION MAY BE PROVIDED TO AN AUTHORISED GOVERNMENT AGENCY/AGENCIES.

“The idea that a Jubilee government that has not provided basic services for Kenyans for the last 6 years is crazy & lying that now it will provide services after U get a new huduma number is a blad fuckin joke. It is sad people have been duped to do it in millions. The big question is who benefits from this project ???? from data collection, to kits supply, to data maintenance etc LOL I mean the whole thing tender for Huduma cards. As a Kenyan U already have a unique identity in many forms from ur birth certificate to ur driving license to ur ID to ur passport to ur KRA pin unique to U so why would U need another one. ???????? what can a Huduma number do that ur ID can’t ????anyway ur data can be used by anyone now & the government has a disclaimer Expect news scams in 2019 where someone can use ur identity to do shit on ur behalf ???????? I hope ur Huduma digits makes U get cheaper fuel & groceries. I AM NOT BOARDING.”

Jalas fired back at him saying:

“You don’t have to mention me! You say I have been paid to tell people to take it…yes I have been paid! Very well! Because this is not just another page this is a media platform just like all radios and tv stations have been paid! There are a lot of things in this country [that are] worse, if this huduma namba will kill me, let it kill me! Bro, you don’t always have to drag everyone into your wars! So, which one will kill people first? The whisky you pour in people mouths in clubs or huduma namba? “saitan! Go take huduma namba! Maybe you wanted to be noticed! There you go! ????????????????.”

Remember you’re repping a whole country hapo! Reaction as Jalang’o introduces his new Asian ‘friend’ Coco

Comedian Jalang’o was recently on Instagram to show off his new friend and Kenyans were more than a little bit judgey.

Jalas, who only introduces Otoyo-like friends on his social media platform, surprised Kenyans by posting a super cute Chinese lady who goes by the name Coco.

Coco is one hot woman and we all know Jalas is very much single. So when he posted her, Kenyans had a lot to say about the two given that the last foreigner posted on Jalang’o page was former US president Barrack Obama.

Obama, if you look at it keenly, is not even a foreigner So Jalas hasn’t been post a lot of then on his platform.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BwW2PAmngo_/

“Thanks for amazing friendship…@coco_fan87” said Jalas. 

Reactions

Coco has been in Kenya for a while now enjoying different parts of the country. In the post, Kenyans reacted differently some asking Jalang’o to make sure he makes the country proud while others wanted him to ask her to clear our China debt.

Here are the funny comments

citizentvgiftedvoices Ata china wakiamua kutupiga fine atleast jalas utakua umerudisha

winnienduku Mtaachana tu

rogersmwangi Jalas rem you represent a whole country

collo_mwenyewe Baa umeanza kulipa deni????????

Why Jalango has not reported to work today and left his boss Mwakidue all alone in studio

If you have tried reaching comedian Jalang’o and hasn’t responded or you listened to Milele FM today in the morning and he wasn’t present, it’s because he’s currently on exam-mode.

The popular radio presenter took to instagram to apologize for not responding to calls, messages and missing his radio show because he’s currently sitting for his exams.

He told fans that he has been given three days off by his boss Alex Mwakideu to finish up on his exams at Daystar University.

“Why Iam not on Radio today! EXAMS…EXAMS…So today I will be starting my end semester exams…so my boss @alex_mwakideu extended to me a 1 day study leave and 2 days for exams ! The whole night has been books! Sorry if you tried reaching me! We must graduate! No turning back fam! Pray for me! Iam ready to this! We are almost there! Talent will get you places but Talent with books will open you many doors!,” said Jalas on Instagram. 

Alex Mwakidue also shared on Instagram that he will be hosting the show all alone till he makes a comeback.

“One Man Army! The General! 93.6 Battalion! @milelefm#MileleNakuruTakeOver.” 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BrUMhq2H7rZ/

Jalang’o: The reason why I left t Alex Mwakideu was because of money

Comedian Jalang’o has been hoping around radio stations lately, with Milele FM being his latest home. At Milele, the comedian rejoined his friend Alex Mwakideu who he worked with at Radio Maisha before he ditched him for Hot 96.

Jalas recently opened up on why he ditched the station and his friend behind saying money came in between them. The offer was so sweet that Jalango had to leave.

Blame money

“What happened is when I left Maisha and he stayed there we only left the Maisha we did not leave the friendship.” he said.

“So I think if there is one person I hang out with is still Alex even when we were apart and guys kept on asking now you guys why are you lying to us that you are not together anymore you need to get yourselves back here. But anyway my reason for leaving Alex was very very simple. It was money. So I went somewhere where I was needed not where I was loved,” he stated.