Lifeline For A D-Lister: The 6 Techniques Celebrities Should Employ To Avoid Negative Publicity

Yesterday was as hot as a pizza oven despite the capital experiencing heavy downpour later in the day. I mean hot in terms of entertainment and its ambiguities. Well, from Java to Ghafla offices to the social media, there was a heavy downpour of its own kind.

Intimidation, blackmail and death threats to this esteemed writer littered the air after that very insightful expose about rapper Kenrazy and his sexual escapades. Kenrazy is a raging man and since it happened, he has been employing almost every means available to deal with this career-threatening yet public interest story.

Well, it is not all done for Kenrazy and his legion who have been abusing and cursing us on the social media. We expose and offer solutions at the same time.

It is good that his wife jumped to his defense after the story hit the internet. She is a smart woman because smart women don’t roast their men publicly. They defend them but deny them food and sex back home until they know the truth.

Meanwhile, here are some of the ways through which artistes who find themselves in Kenrazy’s situation can meander their way through the negative publicity and still curve a niche for themselves.

Avoid Controversies (Avoid Flirting if You Are A Married Man)

A married man should always remain a married man, unless you want to marry a second wife, something that has really become archaic in the recent past. An artiste should realize that they are celebrities who matter a lot in the Kenyan celebville. Women will always want to be associated with you and would go to all depths to make a living out of your fame and success. They will therefore hit you below the belt when you least expect and probably chop off your balls. You need to be keen on how and what you chat with them. With the arrival of smart phones and other electronic gadgets, it is easy for a celeb to be pinned down, and especially when they are married.

A celebrity should really try to avoid controversies because blogs and gutter press will always be knocking at your doors to know what is cooking in your house. And there is absolutely nothing you will do about it. They have been there before, and they will always be around to check every step you make. This you can take to the bank but it will always remain the truth. How else do you want us to make a living?

Get out of the D-List Zone

Look, you are a D-lister, you court so much controversy that even flies from Dandora dump site can smell and swam around and then you expect us to keep quiet about it? Hell no. a celeb or rather an artiste gains respect when they get out of the D-list. Take for instance the likes of Sauti Sol who are the most coveted and feted singers in Kenya and East Africa at large. This group has always made positive news, why? Because they are focused.

Funny enough, the D-listers always court controversies and when they are exposed, they go berserk, abusing bloggers and issuing death threats. That itself tells you you really need to get out of the jungle and start living with fellow human beings.

If there was a negative story about Sauti Sol, its singers wont provide false information on social media to impress boot lickers and a$$ kissers. Never. They would find a way to go about it. I remember when I was fresh at Ghafla I did a negative story about some very respected artistes. All they did was to call and promise to rectify. They saved themselves the agony of facing off with a blogger. They did not go to the social media to blackmail us on how we solicited money from them to kill a negative story. So who is Kenrazy to give Ghafla money?

D-listers like Kenrazy should be out of that zone already. He has been in the industry for too long to be a D-lister. And this explains why he is always in trouble with girls yet he is a married man.

Never Try To Blackmail The Press

This is the worst sin a celebrity who believes in themselves would do to themselves and the public. Blackmailing the press is close to blackmailing your creator. How on earth do you lie to the public that a media house tried to solicit money from you when you know you cannot lie to yourself?

Maybe there are some things you don’t know about media. Everything is done in an orderly manner. Everything. We are in possession of everything we do. We do them orderly. When Kenrazy lied to his fans that I tried to solicit money from him to kill the negative story about him, he did not know that I had recorded every word he uttered and every word I uttered. I pinned him down with the recordings and he quickly rushed to his Instagram account, blocked me and deleted all the lies he had posted.

He later posted saying he would have killed me in case I went to meet him at Java, Kimathi Street. This shows the amount of blackmail the artiste was trying to do to Ghafla. He lost it. And this should send a clear warning to those who are used to this. Blackmailing a blog is next to blackmailing God.

Pretend Like You Never Heard It

Look, as long as you are a celebrity, there will come a time when something negative will pop about you. Are you gonna take to the social media to defend yourself with lies? Someday I will say Kenrazy is shorter than me and probably he is suffering from the short man syndrome. Are you gonna take to the social media to try and defend yourself how tall you are and try to say I solicited money from you to avoid the topic? It is evident you are short and probably suffering from the short man syndrome.

To walk away with it, ignore me. Just ignore me. When you respond, you give me a story for another day. I do it and piss you even more. You threaten to kill me and I report the matter to the police and my colleague pens another story telling the world how you threatening to kill me. Your career starts to plummet. You drop from the D-list to the E-list.

To save yourself when negative publicty comes, ignore and move on. If you can’t call our offices and express yourself. Remember we don’t want your money because we make more than enough. tell my editor your story and we will put it up exactly as you say it. Trying to pick a quarrel with a blog is like you want to quarrel with God. I repeat, never pick a quarrel with a blog.

Avoid Boot-lickers and A$$ Kissers, They Will Make Think You Are Right

Boot-lickers and a$$ kissers are a common phenomenon in Kenya. They masquerade as your true and loyal fans but all they want is use your social media posts to gain traction and more followers. They will pretend to defend your rant on bloggers but have never appeared near you to defend you. They have never bought your original CDs and DVDs. All they do is go to Muthurwa Market and get Kshs.50 CDs and DVDs, effectively leaving you in the D-list. They do not download your songs. Many do not even know that you have a new D-list jam.

They know Sauti Sol better than they know you. They love Jaguar more than they love you. They are on Jaguar’s, Prezzo’s, Sauti Sol’s, Avril’s, Elani’s timelines to see what they do. They only check in on yours to see how you have abused Ghafla so that they can assure their support for you.

Funny enough, boot-lickers and a$$ kissers will comment on your timeline but will not help your D-list music to move to A-list. Ole wako kaka!

Loathe Social Media Rejoinders

They have never worked for veteran and successful celebrities. So do not expect them to work for you, a mere D-lister. Social media rejoinders will always be social media rejoinders. They will excite bootlickers but will never solve your shit.

If you want to really defend yourself, request Mzazi Willy M Tuva to host on his Mambo Mseto Show. Or Milele FM’s Allan Wakori and Nzula Makosi. Or Radio Maisha’s Mwende Macharia and Clemmo. Or KBC’s Bonny Musambi. They will give you the best platform to defend yourself. And here you wont verbal diarrhea like you do on Instagram and Facbook and Twitter. You will be controlled and so you will make sense. You wont lie that we solicited money from you.

You are a D-lister and this should help you live among A-listers.