Tattoos! What they say about you…

What does your tattoo say about you as an individual?

After all the hype about tattoos and all the talk about which celeb has what tattoo, i figure it’s time i weighed in on common mistakes guys make when choosing where to put tattoos.

To start us off, lets 1st talk about guys who have tattoos on their heads/ faces. In Kenya, though the percentage of these schmucks is marginal, these are usually guys trying to mimic their favourite rapper. Almost all resort to putting a tear under one of their eyes. This basically lets the rest of us know that you are a sheep. You blindly copy what others are doing. Not only is this a dumb move but it also betrays an underlying mental condition. That translates to you having a couple of crossed wires in your head. It tells us that you are most likely criminally insane.

Guys with tatoos on their necks usually have personality disorders (such as anger management issues) and have resigned themselves to the fact that they’ll never have a corporate job. In Kenya, the number of people with these tattoos has been on the increase… which i guess explains the increase in reported cases of road-rage.

The guys who get barbed wire tatts around their biceps are almost always invariabley douchebags. These are the muscle heads in vests or sleeveless muscle shirts bullying& pushing people around. I personally believe that such guys are compensating for um… shall we say inadequacies?

And the biggest mistake guys make in matters body-art is getting tramp-stamps either on their bellies or on their backs. Only p**n stars are allowed to have these and i can’t say this enough but dudes, lads, boys, vijana& maboys, if you are straight you have no business putting a tattoo around your belly button &/or nipple. The tatt artist has to constantly manoeuvre around that area so unless you want them to play around your junk, steer clear of getting ink done around these area.

And a word of caution for the lasses, please stop getting ink done in your inner thighs or your private area. All such art work does is let me know that you are an easy lay& when we’re done should, sudden areas begin to itch &/or burn, i have only myself& all the blue moon vodka we drank together to blame!