5 Ways Donald B Kipkorir, The Kenyan Lawyer Is Quite Similar To American Presidential Candidate Donald J Trump
He’s quickly becoming something of a legend… Not for his brilliant exploits in the corridors of justice,but for his social media notoriety and juvenile penchant to floss around his latest acquisitions.
He is a lawyer,alright but we are now knowing him more as the guy who has made the Internet his Reality TV show,sparring with bloggers and haters alike,splashing his photos of fortune and privilege across the web as if to spite the poor… Or to get back to a lover who left.
He’s Donald B Kipkorir. Or DBK… A name we are not sure is his stage name,username,nickname,abbreviation name,pimp name,code name,drug underworld circles name or strip club name.
He loves to ball – and to splash the Internet with the photos of his dinner dates,lunch dates and birthday trips to Dubai for a weekend (or a whole week) of nothing but heavy indulgences that will set him back tens of thousands of dollars.
Many call him the Deputy President’s friend.
Others see him as a rich,spoilt brat who has refused to grow up,settle down,get married and accept that he’s past it.
He must still think he’s 24. Driving the flashiest,noisiest turbo-fitted sports car down the college driveway,winking at the nubile girls walking down to class.
He’s now becoming a nuisance. A social media punching bag and the target of bile and vitriol from bloggers and fellow lawyers alike who find him obnoxious, off-putting and intolerable.
Still,he remains obdurately unrepentant.
He’s a Donald,after all.
So now… Here are 5 Ways American Presidential Candidate Donald Trump Is Quite Similar To Our Own Donald Kipkorir, The Lawyer.
1. Rich, Rich, Rich
Both are called Donald. And both are terribly rich. Not EQUALLY rich,though. But rich nonetheless. Donald J Trump is worth a whopping $7 Billion dollars – that is according to his own inflated estimation. But according to Forbes magazine,the flame-haired fascist is worth roughly $4 Billion. That’s alooooooooooot of money. In fact,that’s wicked money. It’s mind-boggling. And downright insane. We are not sure what’s the net worth of our own Donald,the lawyer. But if he can afford weekly lunch dates at high-end eateries in Hurlingham and Westlands,picking up a tab running into hundreds of thousands of Kenya Shillings,just for steak and pork and some orange juice,you can rest assured that Donald Kipkorir is tantalizingly rich. Heck,he’s just acquired a Range Rover HSE 2016. Worth over 20 Million Kenya Shillings. That’s what we call RICH.
2. Proximity To Power
Even before he made the unconventional decision of vying for President,and making such a shocking success in the primaries,Donald had been friends with power for a long time. He’d been friends with the Clintons even before he became their number one political rival. He’d been friends with corrupt New York mayors and Governors as New York is his playing ground and home to most of his high rise properties. And just like Trump,our own Donald does have friends in (very) high places too. To make the long story short,Deputy President William Ruto is one of his best friends. And just the other day,Governor Kidero was over at his home in Muthaiga for chai ya saa kumi. Hmmmm….
Donald Trump and his wife Melania pose with the powerful Clintons who attended his wedding at Mar-a-Lago Estate in Palm Beach,Florida
POWER: Donald Kipkoror poses with His Excellency Uhuru Kenyatta
3. Love To Showoff
Both Donalds are notorious exhibitionists. They will let you know every little thing they’ve bought. As for the American Donald,he doesn’t buy little Range Rovers worth a measly $200,000. He buys REAL stuff. In real places. Like Trump will buy off a whole Island. Buy away an entire Golf course – and the surrounding village. Or buy a gold-plated Airbus like it’s nothing. Our less wealthy Donald buys stuff too – of a much lesser value though. He will waste no time in showing off his farm in Karen and houses in Rift Valley. Just like the Donald will waste no time in showing off his golf course in Scotland and private castle in Italy. And just like Trump, our Donald loves to have his name splashed across his automobiles. He has the initials DBK as his Range Rover number plates. The original Donald has the names ‘TRUMP’ on pretty much everything he owns – Towers,Jets,holiday homes,hotels,casinos,cars, underwear, everything. And it’s all in gold,in case you forgot.
4. Superficial
Both Donalds are the cheapest pieces of crap in the World. Trump’s life is a joke – a petty affair that revolves around pretty bimbos,fast cars,jets and celebrity life. And our own Donald is pretty much the same… From the outside,they both don’t look like they really know what matters in life. To them,life is all a huge party where everything revolves around holidays and excessiveness and parties and wanton expenditure. Also,pretty women and vanity. Not a bunch you can take seriously. Not a pair that seems to take itself seriously. They don’t even take family serious – I mean,our Donald Kipkorir is not even married and doesn’t seem to give two hoots about starting a family (at least an official one) while the other Donald has been through some of the messiest and crappest marriages and divorces in the world. He has even confessed to finding his own daughter Ivanka sexually attractive and has said he would date her were she not his daughter. Gross. Both can be very vain and full of nothingness. Just pettiness and emptiness… That’s all they really are.
5. Refusal To Grow The F**K Up!
None of the two exhibits the mannerisms and temperament of a man who has grown the f**k up. They’re both very childish and puerile in the way in which they publicly conduct themselves. For men their age,you expect a certain level of genteelness and class,a certain aspect of manliness and maturity but sadly,it’s lacking. The American Donald is a class 3 bully and a troll who loves to pick stupid fights with women and children both on Twitter and face to face. While our Kenyan Donald won’t just act like the learned friend he is preferring to conduct himself with the temperament and infantile excitement of a teenager on social media. Both desperately need to grow up,need to calm their balls and need to stop beefing with female media personalities. Donald Trump with Fox News’ Megyn Kelly and Donald Kipkorir with Nation’s Njoki Chege.
But rich people don’t need to be told how to act. They’ve already made it anyway…And they can be the biggest A-holes in the World if they wish to. Really.
