Nameless, his daughters and the question of legacy

Nameless was recently put on the spot by his fan who asked him whether or not he desired to have a son because as we all know now, he is a father of three daughters with the youngest having been born to him and Wahu on the 12th of October, 2022.

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During an exchange on a social media post he had made to announce the birth of the wee one, the fan said,

Tafuta Kijana boss…your legacy. We Africans.

And to this, Nameless’ response was virtue signalling,

Dalphine Memba actually I really want my legacy to be a father of three beautiful gals filled with wisdom, humility and compassion. Who will live a responsible life that creates peace and joy for them and for others around them. For them, that is the vision I am working towards.

But the truth is that that fan wasn’t too far off the mark. It is actually a primal urge for men to sire sons and for women to desire the gender of their children to be female. That is why more often than not, when a single father raises a daughter, he socializes her to be more masculine hence tomboys and when a single mother raises a son, she raises him to be effeminate ergo mamas boys.

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In all honesty, the best way for him to have handled the situation would have been for him to have kept silent. Why address a comment you suspect is a troll post? But then, the truth is, what is he supposed to do? If, and this is a simple hypothetical, she is saying the truth and he does indeed desire a son, then is he supposed to admit the same to a total stranger and on social media?

What if Nameless doesn’t actually want sons and he is totally fine with only having daughters, does he think his rant does anything to change the minds of most uncomplicated people? No. It only works wonders for the people who control corporate purse strings. The people who can hire him for performance or help him hold a concert.

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As I said earlier, the truth is that this is a pretty primal instinct in us as human beings. When we have children we want them to be of our gender. So what that woman said to Nameless wasn’t disrespectful, backwards nor unsophisticated. She was literally speaking what many people hold to be true.

Perhaps it is informed by the understanding that when the daughters are grown, they will leave his household and join another. That is where the question of legacy came from. What is Nameless’ legacy? It won’t just be the work he does as an architect nor his body of work as an artist, it should also be his children and from our traditional understanding of life as Africans, sons would be it. But he has no choice so Nameless has to double down and accept that his legacy is his daughters and then act like it is him being a modern man.

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Sources:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8804262/

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/10.1177/147470491301100408